Similar to the satisfaction a thirsty man gets after drinking a refreshing glass of orange juice, and similar to the satisfaction a cigarette smoker can get after taking that first morning puff, it seems to be the way of things that once you have had your fill, your refreshing OJ and your pack of Camel Lights are the last thing on your mind.  That is… until the next craving arrives!

Something that has happend, that was weird, was that for the last several months after I had bought a new rubber strap for my beloved Seiko Black Monster, my cravings, my need to get more watches just kind of stopped.  I was in a zen-like place where I felt at peace with my watch collection and didn’t feel the need to get more.  I didn’t drool over watches I saw in TV or in magazines, I didn’t have watch wallpapers on my computer screen anymore, and I just didn’t really care about watches anymore.  I took the position that most sane people took.  I believed that watches were simply used to tell the time.

To speak such blasphemy from an individual such as myself really surprised me, but that is genuinely what happened.

That is only until very recently…

During a basketball game with my brother and some cronies, my brother got fed up with the chunky watch bezel of my beloved Seiko Black Monster tearing off pieces of his flesh and insisted I take it off.  Overestimating its durability I tossed it aside to the grass surrounding the court and heard a very audible thump as it hit the bare ground.  Thinking it to be fine I had continued to wear it until I realized that 8 p.m. looked awfully sunny for that part of the year.  Yup the watch was running VERY fast.  The fact that the repair estimates cost more than the watch itself meant that I had to give it up and say goodbye to my beloved Black Monster.

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3
R.I.P Seiko Black Monster (2007-2009)

I also got a rife good lesson in the potential costs of automatic wristwatch repair, and to utter another blasphemous phrase, I believe it would make life much easier just to a quartz.

That would be all fine and well, but just the utter thought of it makes me want to throw up my lunch.  You see quartz watches have no passion to them, no soul, their hearts are like the hearts of robots whereas mechanical watches have the hearts of people within them. (not literally of course).

My zen-like state with watches being over, the absence of an automatic diver within my collection has left me feeling incomplete and inadequate as a human being.

The search begins…

Have you ever bought a diver’s watch and wondered as to the exact purpose of that exclusively left-turning ring doohickey surrounding the dial of your watch?

Well let me just say, if you feel stupid because you don’t know how to operate this thing, that’s because you probably are.

Seriously, even a monkey can do this:

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3

IS A MONKEY SMARTER THAT YOU?!?!

If you don’t know what I am talking about I’ll show you what I mean using my Seiko Black Monster:

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3

This is a typical dive watch, and if you’ve read some of my earlier posts you know that I love this watch even though it does weigh a ton. It’s got everything that a typical dive watch has got. It has luminous hands and markers, great depth rating, tough steel case and bracelet, rugged looks, and most importantly of all for the purposes of this tutorial, it has a diving bezel.

If you still don’t know what I’m going on about I have singled out the diving bezel just for you:

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3

Now as you see the bezel has minute (or seconds if you will) increments that goes up to the number 60. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that because there are 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in a hour, and the fact that a diving bezel is on a bloody WATCH, probably means that its purpose has got something to do with measuring time.

Well you guessed right genius, a diving bezel is used to measure time, and its purpose, diving of course.

I won’t bore you with the details of diving but the purpose of a diving bezel is typically for divers to time their decompression stops. You see, when a diver goes deep underwater they have to endure a great deal of pressure. Going down to great depths, however, is not quite the same as coming back up. A diver can get down to great depths relatively fast, but when coming back they can’t do it too fast or they might get sick or even die.

To overcome this, divers have to come up in carefully-timed stages, and in this situation a watch becomes as important a diving tool as a wet suit and a scuba tank. You ever notice how the increments on a diving bezel are different from the 0-15 minute position as opposed to the rest of a bezel? That is because the typical decompression stop for most diving situations is 15 minutes. Ever wonder why you can only turn the darn thing counterclockwise? That is because it is safer for the diver not to perceive a shorter elapsed time if the bezel should accidentally get turned after it is set.

Well now that you know a little more, it’s time to learn how to operate the thing.

Well here is my Seiko Black Monster sitting on the wrist of your humble presenter. As you notice the bezel is set so that the ‘zero’ mark is set at the 60 minute, or 12 o’clock position:

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3

Let’s just say we are underwater on a dive. Actually forget that! I want to use a more real-world situation, so let’s say we want to know how long it takes for my cake to bake. Disregarding the above shot of my Black Monster, the current time on my watch is 11:40, so what we want to do is turn the bezel so that the ‘zero’ mark, or the big triangle, is hovering right over my minute hand like so:

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3

So now that my bezel is set I just leave it there until I need it again. When my minute hand reaches 11:55 that would mean that 15 minutes has elapsed, when the watch hits 12:00 that would mean 20 minutes have passed and so on and so on…

Well I’m smelling a burning from the office oven so that must mean that my cake is done. I read my watch and it looks like this:

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3

Now pay attention. How long was my cake in the oven? Look at the time, it is now 12:18.

If haven’t figured it out at this point, than you have problems. Here is the solution:

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3

Main purpose of a diving watch is diving, but I suspect that diving bezels all across the world will do just as well timing steaks on the grill as well.

Well there you have it monkey. That is how you use a diving bezel:

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3

Unbeknown to most of world there is a type of watch that can withstand the extreme pressures of the cold and endless deep. This type of watch will continue to work in extreme depths long after its wearer has expired, and as a marvel it is like a high-tech multi-million dollar submarine wrapped in a package no larger than… well a watch really!

This type of watch is known as a dive watch.

Like an SUV its original incarnations were purpose-built. In the mid 20th century there was an increasing demand for watches to be able to withstand certain depths and tell time accurately and legibly while doing so. The need for divers to accurately and reliably time their decompression stops, level of oxygen, etc. was soon beginning to mean the difference between life and death.

Touting features such as a unidirectional rotating bezel, big luminous markers, and usually beefy and rugged aesthetics, dive watches suddenly become popular amongst the non-diving crowd as being watches that made even fat middle aged accountants look like undersea cave explorers.

Here is an example of a great diver with a Seiko Black Monster belonging to yours truly:

Seiko Men’s “Black Monster” Automatic Dive Watch #SKX779K3

This is a very rugged watch indeed. I swim with this watch, I shoot with this watch, I play golf with this watch, you name it!

The perceived idea behind dive watches is that because it is capable of withstanding extreme depths, it is also just as capable at withstanding all the various harshnesses above the water as well, and with the divers I have owned over the years, I believe that to be absolutely true.

Another fan of the dive watch: James Bond, who has in almost all of his movies worn a dive watch.

But just like SUVs of the modern era, modern-day dive watches have gone beserk!

You see the reality is that many watches can handle all of things that an ordinary life may throw at us. Most of us aren’t Jacques Cousteau and most of us don’t really need a dive watch, but people seem to embrace the idea and adventurous aura that is associated with them even if they themselves are ill-prepared to tackle the depths their watches can withstand.

The era of useful mechanical divers is long gone though. Recreational divers and watch enthusiasts can certainly dive with them, but most professional divers these days use virtual computers with straps on them, such an example of this would be the Suunto D4:

Today it seems as though mechanical dive watches are less about diving now than they are about watch manufacturers constantly trying to one-up themselves on how deep their watches can go. And at this stage they have gone just completely insane.

I’ll give you an example with the IWC Aquatimer:

IWC Aquatimer Automatic – 3548.07 Gents Watch

Now you see, beyond 300 meters of depth you are pretty much dead, so my guess is that
the one THOUSAND meter depth rating of the IWC Aquatimer offers more than enough headroom for any diver. So who thought of THIS:

IWC Aquatimer Automatic 2000 – 3538.03 Gents Watch

Now this is the IWC Aquatimer 2000, and the difference between this one and the standard model is that this one can go TWO THOUSAND meters underwater.

Now in my mind that is like making a watch that can go to Mars and then making a watch that can go to Mars AND Jupiter. I mean sure it’s a great accomplishment, but what’s the point?!? You ain’t going to neither so why make a watch with capabilities no one can come anywhere close to reaching.

I can offer you another example with the Omega Planet Ocean, and for those of who don’t know, this is the most recent Bond watch, and you can see the larger rubber-strapped version strapped on Daniel Craig during the first half of Casino Royale.

Omega Seamaster Planet Ocean – 2201.50.00 Gents Watch

There’s no getting around it with me: I LOVE this watch. It is like taking all the things you love about the Rolex Submariner and combining it with all the things you loved with the previous Bond Omega Seamaster. It is a great watch indeed, but I’m afraid it is also guilty of carrying around some unnecessary garnish.

First of all, this watch has a depth rating of 600 meters. Human divers cannot go anywhere near that depth unless they are either in some kind of submarine or have long since expired. That’s not too bad though…

The most important thing is that the Omega Seamaster Planet Ocean, like many Omega Seamasters before it, sports a “helium escape valve.” See that funny looking crown at the 10 o’clock position? That’s the helium escape valve, and whether you love it or not it is a characteristic feature of most of the Omega Seamaster line.

So what does that thing do? Well in short, it’s a one-way opening that lets helium get out of your watch case.

You see, below a certain extreme depth that you will never reach, oxygen becomes more and more toxic and helium is used more for breathing than oxygen. Helium has a downside in mechanical watches in that its molecule is so small it can penetrate into your watch and then rapidly expand upon resurfacing. This can effectively pop off your watch crystal as well as damage other watch components.

Sure it works, but it’ll never be an issue since only professional divers will ever go so far, and I can tell you they wouldn’t be using an Omega Planet Ocean. So there you have it, the helium escape valve is utterly utterly useless.

In conclusion, as far as mechanical dive watches go, I absolutely love them. They are my favorite kind of watch and I will continue to own them and beat them up for years to come

Sorry I couldn’t resist. Happy Valentine’s Day to all. Here is another picture I dug up of my tough as nails Seiko automatic Diver’s watch called the BLACK MONSTER. I hope you all have a love as strong as the love I have for my Black Monster:

Seiko Diver’s Automatic 200M – Black Dial – Stainless Bracelet

No it’s not what you think. Although it’s not far off, but… Oh never mind! This is the Seiko Black Monster I’m talking about here. It is a diving watch from the far east with a small but loyal cult following. Originally available only in Japan it has made it’s way overseas and your humble presenter was able to scoop one up. Without further adieu, here is my Black Monster:

Seiko Diver’s Automatic 200M – Black Dial – Stainless Bracelet

When I first picked this up I immediately knew why this watch is nicknamed the Black Monster. It’s big, it’s thick, and it’s heavy. (Hmm…) This is a big chunk of metal no doubt. It’s not the biggest Diver’s watch you will find, but for me and most people it’s more than enough watch. Its nighttime illumination is top-notch. It’s accuracy is unheard of at this price level, and I have a feeling this automatic watch will last many many years without the need for servicing. Here it is sitting on the wrist of your humble presenter:

Seiko Diver’s Automatic 200M – Black Dial – Stainless Bracelet

It’s big, it’s heavy, and it’s ugly, but I absolutely love this thing. The clasp is an especially nice touch with both push button and deployment adding two layers of security to the thing. The bracelet is super-solid and honestly I’m hard-pressed to find much of a difference between this and something like a Rolex Submariner. I suppose you won’t feel such a loss if you should happen to drop this thing in the ocean, but as far as I know, this watch is the best value, best bang for your buck. However you want to put it, it’s a steal. I love my Black Monster.